Goodbyes are Hard :'(

 

 Haha. Cliche? Yepp, righteous. Life is all about things making their way until people are tired and gotten used to it. Why oh why do we have weaknesses? I don't know, people say it's life. It spices things up for us sometimes. I'm writing this more to a personal basis. I once have a friend who was everything to me. If you're reading this, good because I'm sick of keeping it to myself. I hate you. However, tell you this, the opposite of love is not hate but it's indifference because if you hate someone so much, you still care yet indifference shows that the person means nothing to you but just a stranger you never knew. So, I do care about you just I can't bear the fact that you treated me like I'm a doll. Play with me when you're bored and set me aside when you got other things to get busy with. Seriously. It just crossed my mind that why am I still waiting when you don't even care. I have to learn to let go, not now but one day. Now, I just need to tell you this.. Thank You. You've been my strength for some time now. I would've broken down and lose the fight but knowing that you were there, I took the courage to get back up. I needed you and you were always there to help. I remembered getting myself stuck in a conflict and I ended up calling you to ease things up. It's easy to open up to you because I trusted you. See how much I relied on you before? You were once my strength but now you've become my weakness. Things change in just a blink of an eye. I cried to myself a lot of time and every time I shed tears, I promised myself to remember that you were the cause of my pain. You are the reason for me not having any trust to anyone anymore. For once I gave my whole trust to someone I was hoping would appreciate it instead that someone crushed them to pieces. I guess I was wrong to trust you from the beginning so I deserved it. I am grateful that you came into my life and walked out because you gave me a glimpse of what life is all about and a new perspective in it.I miss you. Believe me but I know one thing for sure, if I am brave enough to say 'Good Bye' life will reward me with a new 'Hello'. I give you my word I'll find the strength to say it one day. Yes, I will (:

Do You?

Yes, I still keep them. I want to throw them away so badly but every time I look at it, I just don't have the heart to do so. Reading them bring back memories that I don't even want to remember, believe me. Now, I keep them in a box and try the hardest to not glimpse at it even for a minute. I don't know if you remember but I do. Every details of what I've written to you once. Why is it so hard to let go? I don't know. It's just that each time I feel like giving up, I think of the reason why I held on in the 1st place. Fortunately, I've realized that some things or people are meant to stay only in my heart but they don't have a place in my life anymore. I do feel grateful that at some point I used to be the reason behind your smile. I let myself become a prisoner to the memories and never wanted to let go. No worries, I am going to let go now that I understand life never gives what we want. It gives only what we need. That's why it is called life. Unpredictable moments come and go never leaving a sign  D: